Linda Seccaspina's Blog (1,030)

The Myths of Swimming After Eating

 

Whenever we had a picnic near a lake as a child, we were told to never EVER go swimming for at least an hour or you were going to have cramps and die. Each time I heard that particular ridiculous information, all I wanted to…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 23, 2014 at 5:30pm — 8 Comments

Florida Changing Stand Your Ground to Grind Your Stand

Two years ago I wrote a story about a den of sin in a retirement community called The Villages in Florida. Some told me it was all hear-say, but the…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 18, 2014 at 5:00pm — 12 Comments

Why They Don't Let Some People Drive

I used to make fun of old people who wore large hats that drove like they were in charge of a float in a parade years ago. I never thought that I would become one of them—surely it would never happen to me. After I suffered a stroke a few years ago I did not drive for over a year as I…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 16, 2014 at 7:00pm — 8 Comments

How to Catch a Fish -- by A Random Dog

Please play while viewing photos.

Hi there! Want to watch me fish?…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 9, 2014 at 5:00pm — 7 Comments

Should We Be Afraid of Religious Gnomes?

My Gnomes in my Gnometown are silent this morning as I eat my breakfast. There never has been a smidgen of loud partying, nor hushed whispers of a revolution to escape the yard. Heather Andrews from Pulaski, Tenn. on the other hand, has a…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 6, 2014 at 8:30am — 4 Comments

Why is it Always Me?



Some people get away with murder. I on the other hand get away with nothing. Even when I am doing nothing, I seem to look suspicious to the higher-ups. In Grade 4 we were lined up one morning to go to our classroom and the girls in front of me were giggling loudly. Miss Wells…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 4, 2014 at 6:30pm — 3 Comments

American Retailers Failing - Blame Canada?



At the beginning of last year, Canada was seen as a gold mine of opportunity for foreign retailers. Target's hotly anticipated launch was just months away, and retailers such as Nordstrom were announcing expansions north of the border. Target's rocky launch, and…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 3, 2014 at 7:30pm — 2 Comments

The Cobweb



She had heard that if she built it they would come—but they did not. Each day she wove another fine line, but instead of cobwebs-- they slowly turned into cables. Would they eventually become chains around her ankles with nowhere to escape she wondered. No matter how hard she worked on her creation, bare…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 2, 2014 at 7:30pm — 2 Comments

Searching for the Wurst

This is Chapter 2 of a chapter fiction piece I am working on.. Chapter 1 might be a bit much..for some.

I lay on a cold padded table blinded by the overhead light waiting for the aesthetic torture to begin. I was…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 2, 2014 at 6:54pm — 2 Comments

Pork DNA Found in Cadbury Chocolate



Chocolate maker Cadbury Malaysia, a part of Mondelez International Inc, recalled two chocolate products after they tested positive for traces of pork DNA, the Nikkei Asian Review website reported.

The traces were found during a periodic check for non-halal ingredients in food products by the Ministry…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on June 1, 2014 at 6:00pm — No Comments

Collecting Your Dog's Urine Sample-- A Comedy of Urination



I am not supposed to be eating the mini cupcake I am microwaving right now. Anything with flour in it is a no-no for my celiac ridden body. But I bought one a few weeks ago and froze it for an emergency such as today. 

You see, my best friend is sick. He can't tell me what ails him as he does…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 28, 2014 at 5:30pm — 8 Comments

Heartbeat Stories of My Best Friend

 

 

Last night I watched the film "Marley and Me" for the 15th time. As Woody Harrelson once said,

“I have not cried this much since Titanic".

When the film first came out I had no intention of watching it. I am not a Jennifer Anniston fan, and really did not know much about the story. How Linda the “Hallmark Queen” could have nearly missed this is…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 28, 2014 at 7:30am — 2 Comments

What Happened to Bill Clinton and the Titanic?

My friend Suze Hawken sent me this and I just had to share.. Enjoy!



One student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!

His cool professor gave him an A+ for this…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 27, 2014 at 7:30am — 4 Comments

Streets of San Francisco Paved in Gold -- Let Them Eat Cake!



If you live in San Francisco, be on the lookout for some mysterious white envelopes -- they may contain $100 bills. An anonymous person is going around the city, dropping off sums of…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 26, 2014 at 8:30am — 3 Comments

Thoughts About the Kim Kardashian Kanye West Wedding by Rob Kardashian

People magazine reports that Andrea Bocelli sang as Kardashian was escorted down the aisle by step-father Bruce Jenner, and the ceremony was performed by Rich Wilkerson Jr., a pastor from North Miami.

If that doesn't sound like enough, John Legend also serenaded the couple inside their…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 25, 2014 at 8:00am — 4 Comments

No, You Can’t Take The Stuff You Hoard To Heaven

May 10th. was National Clean Your Room Up Day.  I would love to see some raised hands from some of you who knew about this special day or participated.

 

I thought so.     nunsence290x277

 

First of all let me clear up the word Heaven in the title. I understand there are some of you out there that do not believe in Heaven, so let me rephrase it and say the following. Where ever you think you are going when you leave this earth there are no storage lockers for…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 23, 2014 at 7:30am — 3 Comments

Are You a Klutz?

I was born on the 24th day of July, which according to family legend, was the hottest day of the year. According to the "stories" of Arthur J. Knight, it took my mother a couple of days to try and force me out into the world. Other old wives tales debate this fact, but the general idea is trouble always finds me. I was supposedly born a perfect sized child with green cat eyes, blonde hair, and a streak of klutziness…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 22, 2014 at 7:30am — 4 Comments

Should We Profit From 9/11?

For a week now I have been reading Facebook posts from guests who have visited the 9/11 Memorial in NYC that opens to the public May 21. Among the comments were many mentions of the presence of a gift shop. DNY Deputy Chief Jimmy Riches said the Museum is being commodified by an "atrocious" gift…

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Added by Linda Seccaspina on May 20, 2014 at 7:00pm — 4 Comments

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