If you ever decide to visit the city of Ottawa, which is Canada's capital, try looking around for the lush forests that have been replaced by concrete, cars, and factories spewing pollution and sewage into the waterways. Smile and say to yourself, "You know, what we have here is a beaver problem!"
A huge population of Canada's national symbol has found a home in Ottawa and if you ask the city of Ottawa, they might say the rodents are letting their status go to their heads. The beavers have been building dams near bridges and road culverts that sometimes flood land and damage roads. In past years, farmers have called them uncontrollable pests.The Sun reported trappers kill about 150 beavers a year to prevent them from damaging infrastructure.
Well that's it then! Scrape those critters off all the Canadian nickels! Actually I have a better idea--bring in the Beaver Whisperer from Quebec! After all, we deported all those hole digging squirrels across the Ottawa river to Quebec; the beavers will be right at home with all the other uncontrollable pests there!
Of course, Canada's wildlife debates are not stopping at beavers today as they are also addressing the management of wild turkeys and Justin Bieber.
TMZ obtained a video of Bieber relieving himself into a mop bucket in the back of a restaurant in New York City earlier this week. The Canadian singer was laughing through the recording despite the fact that some unwitting employee probably had to clean that up. To top it all off, at the end of the clip Bieber sprays a photo of Bill Clinton with Windex and says "F**k Bill Clinton!"
If anyone else peed in a bucket, including a beaver, they would have been arrested on health violations. Today Americans are insisting on a petition to deport him back to Canada. Listen, Canada doesn't want him either--that's why he's there!
Saying it's okay for Bieber to be a degenerate at 19 just because he's a young man making mistakes is unacceptable. First off, it's terribly unsanitary. Second, someone had to clean out that bucket. Third, he and his friends appear to have been drinking, and he isn't old enough to legally drink in the United States. However the beavers are!
After all, it wasn't us that made him famous. The US media got hold of him when he was just a YouTube meat head. Maybe the city of Ottawa should also put their threatening beavers on YouTube so the US can make them famous too!
Of course it does not end there.
Bieber's tour stopped in the Windy City at the United Center Tuesday and he had access to the Chicago Black Hawks dressing room. Not only did they let him in the same room with the Stanley Cup, I also saw a photo of him standing on the Indian logo on the floor of the locker room. C'mon, Hawks, you're better than that--and thank you for not letting him pee in the cup.
Lord Stanley probably rolled over in his grave as now the Stanley Cup has just become the unmanly cup. Beavers are our national symbol, and unfortunately Justin Bieber is too. Having Bieber right up there with beaver is embarrassing for you and irritating to me. Someone please drop him off in Compton or the South side of Chicago. If there is any room, we will call the Beaver Whisperer to relocate those Ottawa beavers too.