Animals and plants are normal.
There are no spiritual awakenings. There are only new doors opening on the pathways of consciousness, on the complete understanding of the infinite all and the connection that is there to everything living and moved on. This is where the story begins and continues to it's end and there is no beginning and there is no end so the story is the purity of the now. The absolute now.
No one is important as no life is more important. We are all together in this and we are all of value in our individual connection to the all.
I feel like I should be more excited than I am over all of this so called success that is going on. I'm not talking about just the success of Gallery 309. The success so far of Gallery 309 is a dream come true for me. It's something I have wanted my whole life. These achievements leave me thrilled and breathless.
The improvements and changes in my life, those are the moments now that are truly taking my breath way. My second or third chance on getting well and feeling better than I am have in a long time, these are the moments that are knocking me off my feet and altering and changing the way I think and feel. These are the things that are bringing me closer to a spiritual enlightment, a new understanding of the infinite connection to the all; embracing the essence of consciousness.
Normal days was all he kept yelling at the top of his lungs.
"I just wish for normal days!"
When ask what a normal day, or what these normal days were his answer was simple. He was say, "I have absolutely no idea."
Every day seems to be a day of fixing broken things, cleaning up messes, searching out missing items, breaking hearts and confusing the masses and I seem to be the one who put all of this into action to begin with.
I just want Normal Days!
Fuck normal days.
For the grand opening of the art gallery at Gallery 309 we had a couple musicians play and had a vegetarian spread of carry in food that was just amazing.
We had a good turnout and everyone seemed very happy and peaceful and all open to the creative juices.
Of course the first performer was an angry lesbian and her songs were powerful and I frankly loved her voice which was an angry growl and yelp at times. There was real passion in her voice. I was comfortable that she didn't offend any of the redneck Christian sensibilities of the rest of the vendors.
The second performer(s) were a guy that comes in with his wife all the time at the market and hangs out with Bird and they also sell organite creations, (I assume wife, may be partner and their little boy. This family is such a beautiful thing to witness. The woman is possibly one of the most beautiful creatures I have ever seen and they as a couple seems so happy and the little boy is an amazing flow of energy and happiness). The guy played electric bass and he had a friend on stage that played bongos.
They were truly unbelievable.
They reminded me though of what Sam and I did in Columbus for years where we were a duo playing around town and playing strange and even at times bizarre songs. Man it was big fun.
God it was so groovy being that open and free with my creativity. That span of time playing music with Sam and then two of my brothers was wonderful but the way it all ended was so sudden and so dramatic and ridiculous and most of the drama and chaos was my fault.
The fist song began with an amazing combination of the bass and bongo and then I caught a glimpse of the lyrics, "I was dumpster diving with Jesus". I breathed a heavy sigh and wondered if this was going to offend my helper who is convinced that there is an army of people praying for me and that I will find him or her, God and be saved. She is truly a wonderful, kind, loving and compassionate woman and she does handle the whole I'm a heathen and she is not really well but now I found myself thinking about he fact that my belief's and likes at this moment could be offensive to the people that I have at times complained about their interests, likes and beliefs.
I watched two customers come rambling down the isle, the woman with her walker being followed by a frowning husband as the duo on stage were blasting out wild liquid drums and distorted bass and I again thought, "Am I going to lose a primary consumer base by having this alternative thinking and entertainment going on?"
They walked on through and didn't seem to be too affected by the performance or the beautiful art that drenched the entire area.
In the past those that didn't like my music, my art, my writing or what I believed in I just told them to go fuck themselves. Now I see that even as a very eclectic and eccentric person with what may to some seem like wild beliefs I am just the same as the radical conservatives and the goofball religious nuts and the haters when I act that way. I also have a business to run and I am trying to integrate a number of different concepts and belief's under one roof and bring together a gathering of all of these things.
These were strange emotions for me. I firmly believe that we all have a right to believe what we believe as long as we are not doing harm to others.
The prepper and his whole gathering are not people I am comfortable being around but the simple fact is that they have a right to their belief's that it's the end of the world and they must prepare for it and arm themselves and be ready to do battle with the government and to kill if need be to sustain their own lives and family and loved ones lives.
I frankly think they are just angry that they didn't get their way, you know , black president, same sex marriages, pulling out of warzones we should have never been in, equal and fair government, liberal concepts and ideas so they all decided to become heavily armed and angry.
Well so far it's working even at those moments when there are bumps in this already bumpy road.
The continued atmosphere of peace and acceptance seems to be taking hold and I am watching the staunchest of rednecks come around and enjoy the show, well, that and they are making money and in all honesty that is what really counts in this place of creative energies, bartering, buying, selling, trading, bullshitting and general life in the not so fast lane.
Of course what happens right now is that I get a sense of what is going on and all the vendors come up and assure me that they are happy all in one day and then a little bit of chaos and disorder erupts on those days that I'm not there. Nothing major enough to cause alarm as to the complete downfall but enough to know that I will have to go in next Saturday armed with the tools necessary to thump the trouble-makers on the head and if need to escort the real trouble-makers to the door but to also praise and give off positive vibes to those who are participating and enjoying this whole new experience.
I wasn't joking, Gallery 309 is a lot more than a flea market. We are definitely a long ways from just being a good ol' boys flea market and it's big fun.
I wonder if this is typical in most individual's lives. You find yourself at an age, for me, fifty-seven and now fifty-eight and all the questions fall into well designed categories that begin to explain life and you find yourself really at a place of peace and understanding.
I don’t' think it happens at the same age for everybody and that means some may beat their heads against the walls for so long that they took to long and have to take the lessons on with them for the next adventure.
I am so unbelievably grateful for being able to see these awakenings and answers fall to my feet. Now it's time for me to explore and learn from the knowledge that is being given to me and to have a grand sack of the infinite consciousness to take with me on my next journey.
I plan on taking my time learning these new lessons which means if I have to listen to what the doctors say and do what they say for a while then so be it. I'm not ready to hop out of the saddle yet. I got a whole lot more riding to do.
it's been a shocker, a shocking experience here for a couple months and I have found those who I can truly trust and care for, who have shown those same energies towards me and I have found those individuals that are filled with infinite wisdom and understanding and I have also found those who are my enemies either by choice or through their own fears and ignorance.
Mr. Happy who has been a person of enjoyment for as long as I have been here in Lima and hooked up with these flea markets is now what I consider to be as close to a perfect combination of all the right elements that make for a perfectly working human being, or, he may be slightly retarded and a closet pedophile but the fact is that his ideals, concepts and beliefs are based upon being there for others as long as it does him now harm and what seemed like cruelty at times was just his form of common sense.
I have learned that the farmer with the bad back is the greatest salesperson of all of my vendors. He is hated by other vendors because he knows what the hell he is doing and he is here to make money. If hanging out with Bird and me and our weirdo friends and lovers make money then he's right there peeking in at the fringes. He has that mentality and emotional swing that allows him to buy something for a buck and know that he will put two bucks in it and then sell it for a hundred and he will not lose a moments sleep over this.
I have learned that my decision to bring the very religious woman who calls me son and her wild and energetic friend into the mix and give them a lot of responsibility doing the things that I am not good at will and is even now showing itself as an action that will save our market.
Marty is so kind to me and I believe that she does spend a little bit of every day praying for me and that she has others that she instructs to pray for me. She calls me son and she treats me like I am her son. Marty also has a work ethic that is greater than any that I have ever seen and when she is confronted with a problem she follows through with a solution and is able to do this without letting her emotions get in the way.
Patricia is a sixty-five year old spark plug of a woman who is sexy and attractive and she is unbelievably sensible with finances and structure. She is open and new with her ideas and will look at what is new and creative but also understands her own chain of creation and will not let anything get to her.
These two women have become so important to Gallery 309 and to me.
I have learned that a young woman named Bird came into the market one day and joined our gathering and has changed the face of what Gallery 309 looks like. Bird has allowed me a chance to fulfill my dream and she has brought an energy and collection of souls to this dusty old building that has given the rest a flowing of new clean blood.
I have also learned that my gonads cannot rule my actions anymore. My gonads are fine and my decisions are better and I am finally seeing some real success through becoming humble and open.
The issues that have arisen with the woman and her husband and her working partner and husband are things I wish I could say have shocked me but the fact is that I knew sooner or later I would have to face the truth with this woman. She has been around with the flea markets since I hit this little town and I knew there would come a day like we have right now where our truths, our destinies and our clashing lives would have to be confronted.
I let these people alter my life in the past. I let them affect a relationship I was in in terrible and negative ways and I'm not saying that the relationship was all heavenly and good but it was a part of me and they took it upon themselves to sabotage it whenever possible.
Now I find myself facing these sad and broken souls and having to make decisions that are based upon what is best for the company and all the vendors, not just what satisfies me, or allows me to participate in my co-dependency and all the other defects like addiction and compulsion.
I also know that all of these decisions are allowing me to become a healthier and happier person. I am doing something that is good for me for a change. I am taking better care of myself god damnit and it feels so good.
Man who would have ever thought that a flea market would be where I would find my success story. Well it damn sure has been a great location for all of that
I become frightened sometimes and can't sleep like right now because I have never been so comfortable and happy and I just become frightened that my time is almost through and I am not ready for this to end yet.
I've got a whole lot more to learn. I'm still an airhead and heard head, so I would bet there's some time left on this wondrous trip, my magical mystery tour.